One ready-made excuse
Take this and vanish gracefully.
I am away for parental leave under the governance of a tiny executive while reality reorganizes my desk into folklore. Deploys, bugs, and incident chatter belong with the on-call humans, not my absence. I will respond when the hallway stops echoing with actionable nonsense. If something is actually burning, page the on-call team before emailing the void again. The pigeons have already reviewed the fallback plan.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
https://ooo.halfbakedidea.ca?ref=copy
Tweak it, steal it, disappear for a while. Leave the breadcrumb if it feels charming.
Keep the same energy
More in this vein
If this one isn't quite it
Other ways to duck out
This autoresponder confirms I am unavailable due to family leave while…
This autoresponder confirms I am unavailable due to family leave while a very small manager runs the schedule and several unlicensed omens. The codebase may continue emitting aler…
This autoresponder confirms I am unavailable due to family leave while…
This autoresponder confirms I am unavailable due to family leave while a very small manager runs the schedule and several unlicensed omens. The codebase may continue emitting aler…
I am away for parental leave under the governance of a tiny executive w…
I am away for parental leave under the governance of a tiny executive while reality reorganizes my desk into folklore. Deploys, bugs, and incident chatter belong with the on-call…
I’ve stepped away from my inbox and will follow up shortly. I have subm…
I’ve stepped away from my inbox and will follow up shortly. I have submitted this to an imaginary committee.